It’s amazing the things you learn about your body, your mind, and those of your child.

For now, here are just 6 of those things.

Comfort is Key

You produce the most milk when you’re relaxed. Lean back, but be in the moment–the more aware you are of baby’s latch, the better your milk will flow.

Extended Eye Contact is Magical

I remember the first time my baby made eye contact with me while breastfeeding. She used to keep her eyes closed, or let her gaze wander since she couldn’t really focus on anything anyway. But that evening, I was relaxing in bed next to my husband and I looked down to see those stunning baby blues staring right into my soul.

My first instinct was to laugh. I was so taken aback. Even a little giddy. I nudged my husband and he had the same reaction. Our daughter stared unblinking for some time. Just observing. So I stared back. I drank her in, committing the moment to memory.

Since then, I’ve had countless staring contests with my daughter. Those moments of extended eye contact are important for her development. No matter what I’m doing–watching tv, online shopping, scrolling my feed–I put it down. When my daughter is staring at me…when she needs me to be 100% present…I can look at nothing else.

No One Knows Your Child the Way You Do

Sorry, dada. The baby and I are practically one person. If a person’s life force were made visible, mine would form a direct line into our daughter.

And because of that, you can’t let anyone make you second guess your maternal instincts. Even other mothers. No one knows your child as well as you do.

A Supportive Partner is Everything

I don’t usually think in the terms I’ve laid out above. I keep things equal as much as possible. We share responsibilities. We’re equally good at reading our baby and knowing her cues. So it’s important to say, no one knows your child as well as you and your partner do.

Having a supportive partner helps you feel happier and more relaxed, which again, helps with milk production. And if they can get a few chores done while you’re tethered, all the better.

I was feeling pretty ridiculous one day, reclining shirtless on the sofa and nursing our daughter. I was feeling pretty unattractive, but I just had to laugh.

“Did you ever think you’d see me like this?” I asked my husband.

“Yes,” he replied. And that was that.

Be Comfortable with Mess

Remember the Serenity Prayer by Chester Nimitz? “Help me to accept the things I cannot change…” With a baby, especially a breastfeeding baby, many things are out of your control, including mess. You’ve probably read that you should lower your standards for cleanliness, and it’s true. But you also need to find comfort in it. The mess is there because you’re putting your child first. You’re making a choice. You’re prioritizing. Be proud of that. The mess will be cleaned soon enough–and your child will grow almost just as quickly. These first few months are precious. Let yourself be engulfed by them.

Eat While You Feed…

…but that’s easier said than done.

My husband has had to spoon-feed me at times when both my hands were occupied and I was starving.

No matter how you treated yourself before you got pregnant, you can’t–or rather, your baby can’t–afford for you to cut calories. No fasting or dieting for you. Not unless your doctor says so. Be sensible, but remember that your nourishment is your baby’s nourishment. You’re keeping someone else alive.